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Gay3 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Gay3 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 15 Feb 2021 at 11:22am

These Cheaters Deserve To Be Called Out
There are some absoluting hilarious accidental cheting texts here LOL People can be so stupid tho' I do have to admit to a couple of PMs going to the wrong person on FB; those damned little boxes that keep popping up when ppl reply whilst you're replying to another Wink

https://travelerdoor.com/2020/06/18/textcheats/?utm_campaign=AE-TW-TD-AU-textcheats-070221-LC-V1-D&utm_source=TW&utm_medium=AE-TW-TD-AU-textcheats-070221-LC-V1-D&l=m&twclid=11361132022295502851


Edited by Gay3 - 15 Feb 2021 at 11:23am
The funniest thing about this particular signature is that by the time you realise it doesn't say anything, it's too late to stop reading it.
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Shawy38 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Shawy38 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 15 Feb 2021 at 11:25am
Here's a joke that's only 4 words long.



Victoria's Contact Tracing Department.
Always was, always will be
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acacia alba View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote acacia alba Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 19 Feb 2021 at 8:32pm
Now some important philosophical questions on life .......

Why do supermarkets make the sick walk all the way to the back of the
store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes
at the front?

Why do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke?

Why do banks leave vault doors open and then chain the pens to the counters?

Why do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in our driveways and put
our useless junk in the garage?

EVER WONDER... Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?

Why can't women put on mascara with their mouth closed?

Why don't you ever see the headline 'Psychic Wins Lottery'?

Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavouring, and dish washing
liquid made with real lemons?

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?

Why isn't there mouse-flavoured cat food?

Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?

Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?

You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why
don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?

Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?

Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?

If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?

We all need to smile every once in a while.

    ?
animals before people.
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GAJ View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote GAJ Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 Feb 2021 at 8:55am
Love these AA, they have done the rounds before but always good for a laugh, many so true..
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote acacia alba Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 Feb 2021 at 11:09am
Always cracks me up when people ask for a mars bar and a can of diet coke.  Seen it so many times and always wonder why .
animals before people.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote TJMitchell Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 Feb 2021 at 11:11am
Perfectly balanced, as all things should be
I wish I had a sig
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acacia alba View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote acacia alba Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 Feb 2021 at 11:40am
Trust you to understand these conundrums Thumbs Up
animals before people.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Sister Dot Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 25 Feb 2021 at 6:16am
“Where in this wide world can man find nobility without pride, friendship without envy, or beauty without vanity? Here where grace is laced with muscle and strength by gentleness confined”
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Sister Dot Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 25 Feb 2021 at 6:20am
A woman from New York was driving through a remote part of Arizona when her car broke down. An American Indian on horseback came along and offered her a ride to a nearby town.

She climbed up behind him on the horse and they rode off. The ride was uneventful, except that every few minutes the Indian would let out a Ye-e-e-e-h-a-a-a-a!' so loud that it echoed from the surrounding hills and canyon walls. 
  
When they arrived in town, he let her off at the local service station, yelled one final 'Ye-e-e-e-h-a-a-a-a!' and rode off.

"What did you do to get that Indian so excited?" asked the service-station attendant. "Nothing," the woman answered "I merely sat behind him on the horse, put my arms around his waist, and held onto the saddle horn so I wouldn't fall off."
 
"Lady," the attendant said, "Indians don't use saddles."
“Where in this wide world can man find nobility without pride, friendship without envy, or beauty without vanity? Here where grace is laced with muscle and strength by gentleness confined”
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote GAJ Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 25 Feb 2021 at 4:40pm
HAHA
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote GAJ Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 25 Feb 2021 at 4:42pm
But I thought he was photo of the day...!!Tongue
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Sister Dot Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 25 Feb 2021 at 9:38pm
Took me back to my Broken Arrow days, remember that show?
“Where in this wide world can man find nobility without pride, friendship without envy, or beauty without vanity? Here where grace is laced with muscle and strength by gentleness confined”
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Carioca Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 25 Feb 2021 at 9:41pm
I remember a good cowboy and Indian movie Broken Arrow , is that the one ?
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote acacia alba Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 Mar 2021 at 10:11am
*The ATO has returned the Tax Return to a man in Townsville after he
apparently answered one of the questions. In response to the question, "Do
you have anyone dependent on you?"The man wrote, *

*"2.1 million illegal immigrants, *

*1.1 million crackheads, *

*4.4 million unemployable scroungers, *

*80,000 criminals in over 85 prisons plus *

*450 idiots in Parliament, thousands of 'retired politicians' and an entire
group that call themselves 'Senators'*



* The ATO stated that the response he gave was "unacceptable." The man
responded by asking ATO, "Who did I leave out?"*
animals before people.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote acacia alba Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 10 May 2021 at 10:27pm

As I sat, strapped in my seat waiting during the countdown, one thought kept crossing my mind ...

every part of this rocket was supplied by the lowest bidder. 

 

- John Glenn
animals before people.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote acacia alba Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 10 May 2021 at 10:28pm

America is the only country where a significant proportion of the population believes that professional wrestling is real but the moon landing was faked. 

 

- David Letterman
animals before people.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Sister Dot Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 31 May 2021 at 10:19am
Carioca, I used to come home from school and watch a cowboy and indian show, I thought it was at least once a week? Think it was called Broken Arrow, or was it Cochise? 
Originally posted by Carioca Carioca wrote:

I remember a good cowboy and Indian movie Broken Arrow , is that the one ?
“Where in this wide world can man find nobility without pride, friendship without envy, or beauty without vanity? Here where grace is laced with muscle and strength by gentleness confined”
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote Sister Dot Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 31 May 2021 at 10:21am
“Where in this wide world can man find nobility without pride, friendship without envy, or beauty without vanity? Here where grace is laced with muscle and strength by gentleness confined”
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote acacia alba Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 10 Jun 2021 at 12:49pm
*ABOUT GROWING OLDER...*

*First ~*      *Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about
your age and start bragging about it.*

*Second ~*   *The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line
for.*

*Third ~*   *Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me; I want
people to know 'why' I look this way. I've traveled a long way, and some of
the roads weren't paved.*

*Fourth ~*   *When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to youth,
think of Algebra.*

*Fifth ~*   *You know you are getting old when everything either dries up
or leaks.*

*Sixth ~*   *I don't know how I got over the hill without getting to the
top.*

*Seventh ~*   *One of the many things no one tells you about aging is that
it's such a nice change from being young.*

*Eighth ~*   *One must wait until evening to see how splendid the day has
been.*

*Ninth ~*   *Being young is beautiful, but being old is comfortable and
relaxed.*

*Tenth* *~**  Long ago, when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it
was called witchcraft. Today, it’s called golf. *

*And, finally ~*   *If you don't learn to laugh at trouble, you won't have
anything to laugh at when you're old.*
animals before people.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (2) Thanks(2)   Quote acacia alba Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 10 Jun 2021 at 12:50pm
*There are three kinds of men: The ones that learn by reading. The
few who learn by observation. The rest of them have to pee on the electric
fence and find out for themselves.*
animals before people.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Shawy38 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 10 Jun 2021 at 1:34pm
Old age Puns
Always was, always will be
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote acacia alba Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 10 Jun 2021 at 1:53pm
Yep, thats me Thumbs Up
animals before people.
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