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Maccamax - Have you thought about an obit?

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Shammy Davis View Drop Down
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    Posted: 18 Mar 2014 at 9:20am
Macca:  When I read this I thought of you.  I recall one of your latest posts (Ukraine) as you were thinking about being a Marine and going to war.  God bless you.LOL

Here's a good sample obit that you might want to follow to leave the world with a bit of your humor.  You can change the names and numbers of wives to protect the innocent.  Hope you will make sure to include your relationship with Princess Julie though.  Historical events are important for the public to know about along with date you lost your virginity.  Victoria was queen then, wasn't she?

http://www.foxnews.com/us/2014/03/17/self-penned-obituary-earns-korean-war-vet-last-laugh-from-grave/



A Korean War veteran who wrote his own heart-warming and hilarious obituary now gone viral gave himself a perfect sendoff, one of his grandchildren told FoxNews.com.

Walter George Bruhl Jr., of Delaware, who died at early Sunday at 80, in Florida, poked fun at society, his wife and most of all himself in the 679-word obituary, originally posted online by his grandson, Sam, last week after Bruhl's family discovered it. In the first line, Bruhl aptly describes himself as "a dead person," and goes on to note his wife of 57 years, Helene, will “now be able to purchase the mink coat” he always denied her because “only minks should wear mink.”

Bruhl’s granddaughter, Kalla, said the obituary was vintage Walter Bruhl.

"It was perfect for him, because he’s always been like that."

- Kalla Bruhl

“It was perfect for him, because he’s always been like that,” she told FoxNews.com. “He’s funny.”

The obituary has made the rounds on Twitter and Facebook, generating positive reviews from folks who never knew Bruhl, but know they would have liked him. Amid the self-deprecating lines and tender memories is the story of a man from humble beginnings who fought for his nation, loved his family and enjoyed an occasional adult beverage.

Here's the obituary in its entirety:

Walter George Bruhl Jr. of Newark and Dewey Beach is a dead person; he is no more; he is bereft of life; he is deceased; he has rung down the curtain and gone to join the choir invisible; he has expired and gone to meet his maker.

He drifted off this mortal coil Sunday, March 9, 2014, in Punta Gorda, Fla. His spirit was released from his worn-out shell of a body and is now exploring the universe.

He was surrounded by his loving wife of 57 years, Helene Sellers Bruhl, who will now be able to purchase the mink coat which he had always refused her because he believed only minks should wear mink. He is also survived by his son Walter III and wife Melissa; daughters Carly and Paige, and son Martin and wife Debra; son Sam and daughter Kalla. Walt loved and enjoyed his grandkids.

Walt was preceded in death by his tonsils and adenoids in 1935; a spinal disc in 1974; a large piece of his thyroid gland in 1988; and his prostate on March 27, 2000.

He was born in Philadelphia, Pa., April 20,1933 at 10:38 p.m., and weighed in at a healthy seven pounds, four ounces, and was 22 inches long, to Blanche Buckman Bruhl and Walter George Bruhl.

He drifted through the Philadelphia Public School System from 1937 through 1951, graduating, to his mother's great relief, from John Bartram High School in June 1951.

Walter was a Marine Corps veteran of the Korean War, having served from October 1951 to September 1954, with overseas duty in Japan from June 1953 till August 1954. He attained the rank of sergeant. He chose this path because of Hollywood propaganda, to which he succumbed as a child during World War II, and his cousin Ella, who joined the corps in 1943.

He served an electronics apprenticeship at the Philadelphia Naval Yard from 1956-61; operated Atlantic Automotive Service Stations in Wilmington during 1961-62; and was employed by the late great DuPont Co. from 1962-93. (Very few people who knew him would say he worked for DuPont, and he always claimed he had only been been hired to fill a position.)

He started at the Chestnut Run Site as a flunky in the weave area of the Textile Fibers Department, and then was promoted to research assistant, where he stayed from 1963-72. In 1972 he accepted a position as an equipment service representative with the Photo Products Department at the old DuPont Airport site (now Barley Mill Plaza).

In 1973 he was promoted to manufacturing engineering technologist and was employed in that capacity until, after 31 years with The Co., he was given a fine anniversary dinner and a token gift and then "downsized" in December 1993. He was rehired as a contract employee in June 1994, doing the same job that he had been "downsized" from, and stayed until July 1995.

He started his own contract business and worked at Litho Tech Ltd. from 1996-99.

There will be no viewing since his wife refuses to honor his request to have him standing in the corner of the room with a glass of Jack Daniels in his hand so he would appear natural to visitors.

Cremation will take place at the family's convenience, and his ashes will be kept in an urn until they get tired of having it around. What's a Grecian Urn? Oh, about 200 drachmas a week.

Everyone who remembers him is asked to celebrate Walt's life in their own way; raising a glass of their favorite drink in his memory would be quite appropriate.

Instead of flowers, Walt would hope that you will do an unexpected and unsolicited act of kindness for some poor unfortunate soul in his name.

A memorial luncheon in Walt's honor will be held Saturday, March 15, at 1 p.m., at Deerfield, Newark.

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (2) Thanks(2)   Quote maccamax Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 Mar 2014 at 10:50am
A good read Shammy.
My better half and I have already done our few words for our Headstones .    That should suffice.
On hers I recommended.      Layed for the final time.
On mine she recommended.    Stiff at last.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Shammy Davis Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 Mar 2014 at 11:39am
You are true to form.  LOLI'll leave my imagination to visualize the size and scope of your monuments.  Hope they don't obstruct flight patterns into and out of Sydney Airport.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Fiddlesticks Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 Mar 2014 at 11:55am
Surely you meant Orbit...??


Panspermia.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Shammy Davis Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 Mar 2014 at 12:04pm
Originally posted by Fiddlesticks Fiddlesticks wrote:

Surely you meant Orbit...??



Confused  Wasn't aware that OZ has a space program.  The way USA and Russian relations are going, you all might propose to take our seats on upcoming flights to the international space station.  Or maybe not . . . recall Abbott shooting his face off to the Russians about the Crimea.  Suspect if there is any shooting to be done it won't be to the stars.  Cry me a river.Cry

Alas, Maxie will be ready whatever occurs, I am sure.  He has announced he is ready to go to war.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Fiddlesticks Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 Mar 2014 at 12:18pm
I think having macca in orbit would make a lot of people happy, give him a big reflective aluminum foil sail and he can use his own hot air as a solar wind to propel himself around the globe.




Panspermia.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote maccamax Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 Mar 2014 at 1:14pm
Shammy .. Shame . Australia Has the biggest Space program in the world.   England did have some input.
It is situated just below Fiddlesticks nose , centrally driven by too much tongue Torque.

   You missed an "H" when you said I was ready for a wore.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Shammy Davis Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 Mar 2014 at 1:46pm
Originally posted by maccamax maccamax wrote:

Shammy .. Shame . Australia Has the biggest Space program in the world.   England did have some input.
It is situated just below Fiddlesticks nose , centrally driven by too much tongue Torque.

   You missed an "H" when you said I was ready for a wore.

Are you "picking" at Fiddles' nose?  Odd place for "space" to be.  For most, it's between their ears.LOL

You should be careful how you refer to your ladies.  You may find that your tomb stone reads "not stiff enough."Wink
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote maccamax Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 Mar 2014 at 2:11pm
   I read where a bloke was too well built to get the lid on the coffin.
The undertaker suggested they cut it off and put it in the Flowers.
The Widow said to cut it off and shove it " you know where " and added that was what he did when she had the Flowers.

Which reminds me of Fiddles,   any port in a storm.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote Shammy Davis Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 Mar 2014 at 2:29pm
Originally posted by maccamax maccamax wrote:

   I read where a bloke was too well built to get the lid on the coffin.
The undertaker suggested they cut it off and put it in the Flowers.
The Widow said to cut it off and shove it " you know where " and added that was what he did when she had the Flowers.

Which reminds me of Fiddles,   any port in a storm.

I just love to hear stories about beautiful relationships particularly when flowers are exchanged for something more personal.  With your numerous experiences I'll bet you could go for hours telling me about them but alas its bedtime for this old man.  Tonight I think I'll dream about being buried intact.  I'll have no problems fitting into anything after I'm cremated.  I'll think my urn should read "melt down for scrape."Thumbs Up  I might even donate some of my organs to science.  They can use them to calibrate microscopes.

"Port in a storm?"  Is Fiddles out fishing today?  Good for him, his 24 hour TBV news service must be stressful.  Probably not as stressful as fishing in a storm though.LOL  I've heard OZ is getting a fair share of fierce winds.  Macca have you been out in the public talking again?
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote Nocturnal Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 Mar 2014 at 2:44pm
Originally posted by maccamax maccamax wrote:

A good read Shammy.
My better half and I have already done our few words for our Headstones .    That should suffice.
On hers I recommended.      Layed for the final time.
On mine she recommended.    Stiff at last.


You are a legend Macca
The only problem with backing winners ? You never have enough on....
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote maccamax Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 Mar 2014 at 3:54pm
Originally posted by Nocturnal Nocturnal wrote:

Originally posted by maccamax maccamax wrote:

A good read Shammy.
My better half and I have already done our few words for our Headstones .    That should suffice.
On hers I recommended.      Layed for the final time.
On mine she recommended.    Stiff at last.


You are a legend Macca


Thank you Nocturnal.   Great to see a few like yourself and Shammy etc. who haven't become too precious to share some wicked humour.
At times I wonder why I have to hold back , when a few complain.
But their complaints are not in vain as my shares in "Rubber Goods" skyrocket with each whinge.


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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote jujuno Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 Mar 2014 at 5:37pm
 I think Macca's wife's headstone should read: "Bored to Death."

 

 
Desert War, Rain Lover, Latin Knight, Hay List, Mustard...my turf heroes...
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote jujuno Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 Mar 2014 at 5:40pm
 mine is going to read "Gone! Yes, finally! Happy now?"

 

 Rejected
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote maccamax Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 Mar 2014 at 6:00pm
Originally posted by jujuno jujuno wrote:

 mine is going to read "Gone! Yes, finally! Happy now?"

 

 Rejected


Don't be Depressed.   We are a long time under the sod.
And things could be worse .    You could be waking up with me to face for the day.
Cherish the thought.     It may not be "Happy Days" but you would certainly have a smile on your face.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote maccamax Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 Mar 2014 at 6:01pm
Originally posted by jujuno jujuno wrote:

 I think Macca's wife's headstone should read: "Bored to Death."

 

 


That would have been OK JJ , but she didn't allow me to do all the boring.      Unfaithful wench.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote jujuno Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 Mar 2014 at 6:57pm
Originally posted by maccamax maccamax wrote:

Originally posted by jujuno jujuno wrote:

 mine is going to read "Gone! Yes, finally! Happy now?"

 

 Rejected


Don't be Depressed.   We are a long time under the sod.
And things could be worse .    You could be waking up with me to face for the day.
Cherish the thought.     It may not be "Happy Days" but you would certainly have a smile on your face.

 the thought of waking up with you is enough to make anyone 

Desert War, Rain Lover, Latin Knight, Hay List, Mustard...my turf heroes...
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote maccamax Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 Mar 2014 at 9:35pm
Be steaming from the ears too.

That's a shocker.   There goes my ego .     
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote acacia alba Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 Mar 2014 at 9:40pm
my headstone is going to say.
Dont get mad.  Just get even .Thumbs Up

animals before people.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote maccamax Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 Mar 2014 at 9:50pm
Originally posted by acacia alba acacia alba wrote:

my headstone is going to say.
Dont get mad.  Just get even .Thumbs Up
   FIDDLES HEADSTONE
Here lies an Atheist
All dressed up
And no place to go.
------------
For Me I will settle for a soft line.:-
     Two things I love most,
good horses and beautiful women,
And when I die I hope they tan this old hide of mine
and make it into a ladies saddle,
So I can rest in peace
between the two things I love
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Fiddlesticks Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 Mar 2014 at 9:58pm
Macca's will say...

Here lies Larry Pickering's french polisher..

Panspermia.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote saintly96 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 Mar 2014 at 10:03pm
When I die, I want free Wi-Fi at my headstone, that way the kids might visit me.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote acacia alba Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 Mar 2014 at 11:46pm
Originally posted by Fiddlesticks Fiddlesticks wrote:

Macca's will say...

Here lies Larry Pickering's french polisher..



who is Larry Pickering ?   And why does he have a french polisher ?
animals before people.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote maccamax Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 19 Mar 2014 at 12:36am
He is a Journo Larry .   I rarely read him but fiddles is in a delusional state again.     How do you get him to take his Rx.

Saintly has the modern kids well tabbed.   They would send a text message. 1st priority.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote acacia alba Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 19 Mar 2014 at 1:18am
OK ,so why does Larry need a french polisher ??
call me old and slow,,but i dont get it.   what is a french polisher ??
kids and texts,,OMG.  they never raise their head and the fingers are faster than the speed of sound.
I think its sad, the way kids now sit and stare at the screen,, and the fingers working O/T.  never join in conversation,,,,,never join in at all,,,just sit there staring at a phone.
what a life !!  
sad really. they dont even know what they are missing.

animals before people.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Shammy Davis Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 19 Mar 2014 at 1:55am
AA:  It's hard for me to keep up with all the colloquialisms in OZ, but french polishing is a wood working technique to bring a high gloss finish to furniture et al.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aF7wANfTub8

Of course, I never know.  Maybe be Fiddles is being naughty.  It's possible Fiddles is delusional also because by my stateside calculations he probably hasn't slept in a month.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Go Flash Go Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 19 Mar 2014 at 6:45am
Not sure how old macca is, by thiis l'm guessing old (in years) but he's still quick on the draw and a deadeye - he even let's them draw first - love your work (most of the time Wink)
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Browndog Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 19 Mar 2014 at 7:23am
A French polisher does a lot of rubbing. You can take it from thereWink
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Shammy Davis Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 19 Mar 2014 at 7:50am
I knew Fiddles was being naughty.  Why would Macca want to put a high gloss on his furniture?

I went to a funeral some years back.  The husband had died at a relatively young age and the widow, with a child for every year she'd been married, was overcome with grief.  She was wailing and crying and friends and family were trying to console her.  This was just prior to the service beginning.  The organ music then began to play softly, the funeral director closed the open casket, and the minister took his place at the pulpit.  The whispers through the church had become silent and then all of sudden the widow screamed, "Lord, lord, he is gone, he is gone and thank goodness he can't go out on me no more!"LOL

The service from that point on was the shortest I'd ever attended.

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Browndog Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 19 Mar 2014 at 7:57am
I think the suggestion was that he was polishing Larry Pickering's furniture. Larry reinforces most of maxies political and social 'wisdom' 

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